Pretty distraught

Wow. I'm sure everyone has had one of those days where something so incredible happens and then in the same day something so awful. Of course, your mind focuses on the awful, causing the good to just fade.

I'll just go through my day chronoligically because I have no idea how to convey this all. Sorry for the depressing tone of this post.

This morning I worked with Denis in the office. It was productive. Things are coming together. I feel really good about the systems that have been set in place. It is now just up to them to utilize them.

At 1pm I met up with Sarita, the founder of the Zion Project (www.zionproject.org) - thanks Stephanie Schneider - and was so encouraged and excited by her. Zion Project is doing phenomenal things with woman who are escaping prostitution. The women were full of emotions and personality (two very stiffled things here) as they greeted me with massive hugs (one even left nursing her baby and charged at me bare chested - I pretended to be unphased). It was evident that God had worked in their hearts, using Zion Project to encourage identity and joy.

Sarita then took me to their girls home. Same vibe as with the ladies. They too swarmed me with hugs. There is literally a lighter air in these environments. These girls who had been trained from as young as 4 in prostitution have been rescued to live in a safe and loving home whose rock is Christ. Interacting with kids my entire trip, I have gotten to see glimpses of the silly goofy kid that lives deep within them. Yet, seeing these 10 girls that have been embraced in truth and love for 1-3 years reminded me how oppressive this place is for kids. These girls were free. It was evident. It was the coolest thing to witness. An overwhelming amount of goofy and silliness.

After that she took me to meet Ron and Joy, two Kenyan missionaries. I can't really even explain this encounter. I felt like God was giving me a big hug. The oppression here is thick, but God is moving. Meeting Ron and Joy was a welcome reminder of that. We opened our time in prayer. I hadn't participated in fellowship like this since I'd come. I came to work. To structure, to contribute (literally as I typed this my oh-so-organized-well-thought-out-2-years-out calendar I've tacked on the wall for HEALS fell down - ha!). Anyhow, being surrounded by fellow believers felt cozy. Into our conversation I learned that there vision is to start a school. So- not only were they Followers, but education advocates (I felt so normal!).

Sarita then dropped me at the Market so I could pick up my newly made pants (stay tuned). At this time school had just let out, which meant there was an above average amount of kids interested in my mzungu-ness. In order to not feel totally rude, I stay pretty focused on what's ahead and pretend not to hear all the "mzungu how are you"'s. Something grabbed my attention- a dog - he looked a bit crippled and mangie. But then I noticed behind the dog a mother was horrifically beating her child. I kept walking. Then it truly dawned on me what was going on - this woman was chasing her child and beating her, the daughter was screaming bloody murder, falling to the ground, trying to get away. There were more than 20 people within 20 yards witnessing. I literally stopped in my tracks and stared. Kids walking by stopped and stared at me staring at the scene. I was frozen - I didn't know what to do. I thought maybe my staring would break up the abuse. I didn't even notice that the dog was barking, growling and moving towards me. Then, one of the ladies called the dogs name because the dog was running at me. I backed away, but then remembered that would only goad the dog. So I stood still already thinking about the rabies shot I'll need. But the dog left me alone. I walked on, pissed, sad, mostly pissed. I didn't know what to do. I was asking God, what I should do. I heard nothing, but I knew I was walking the wrong way, so I turned around and walked back to the scene. I marched up to the mother and other women sitting there surrounding the balling child and asked her why she was abusing her child. They chuckled and explained she'd done something bad. I don't even know what I said, i just kept asking why were they doing this- she is just a child. I had really caused a scene. They reasoned that this doesn't happen everyday. I wanted to grab the girl and take her away to safety. But I didn't. I don't know how long I stood there just staring at them- terrified, enraged, feeling stupid, yet empowered, trying to figure out what to do next. I left the girl and the family.

I got about 300 feet before I broke down. What the heck am I supposed to do? Am I to just shrug at what I witnessed. It is SO common to beat your child here that you just get laughed at when you question it. People console you and agree that it is terrible, but with no surprise or hope of fixing the situation.

I don't know this girls name, but please pray for her. I don't know why I saw this happen, was I supposed to take her? I don't know, I don't know.

Even writing this I feel really dramatic and sappy. I don't really care.

I feel like David when Uzzah dies after touching the ark. (2 Samuel 6). Pissed. But then the ark goes in Obed-Edom's home and the home is blessed and hope is renewed. Please pray with me for the girls home - let's put the ark in her home and believe it will be blessed. I don't know what else to do.

I finished the night having dinner with Monica and Germina - they told me countless stories of the corrupted government here. It really lifted my spirits.