I need people.

"Heidi, it's called growing up."

A friend said this to me after I vented about my recent apartment move. I am living alone (well, until I get a roommate :) ). I have no furniture and no "home" possessions. My first night I prepared and ate dinner with 1 knife. I forgot I didn't own silverware. My second night the toilet clogged and the smoke alarm wouldn't stop beeping- so I slept at my sisters (grateful for the good excuse). The third night, I was with my friend Meridith and one long convo and a fajita dinner later, the toilet again clogged- this time around it was TWICE as bad (if you catch my drift). Between the laughing, crying and plunging, Meridith prayed over the toilet for it's release. Instantly the toilet unclogged! HA! They must have toilets in heaven. God seemed to understand our turmoil.

Although hilarious- this experience did not improve my attitude about this apartment.

Does anyone else cringe at the idea of growing up? I always have. Growing up I would plop myself onto my parents bed and express my wish to stop time. To freeze life from moving forward. Not to die, but sort of. A bit morbid.


I thought living on my own would be good for me. I'm sure it will be- but 2 weeks in (I know, not long)- I hate it. Is it that I don't have a closet to share, or that I have to buy my own set of silverware, towels, etc.? Whatever it is, I am embarrassed at my newly discovered aversion.

All this to say, I have begun rethinking my aspirations to be independent. I hold the belief that one should be strong enough to live with out anyone else. But perhaps humans need eachother and meant to take care of one another. In fact, it doesn't take much to notice that humans are naturally inclined to lend one another a hand.

Maybe my reluctance to grow up is motivated by the realization that I am moving farther away from being taken care of- of relying on others- of considering others.

Is this as pathetic as it sounds?

If independence is such a good thing, why do these independent people seem prideful? If it's a strong characteristics, why do those who fully fend for themself have less patience? If being on your own is a mark of maturity, why can it lead to being stuck in your ways and unable to adapt to others?

I'd like to suggest that we should be less eager to be independent and aspire more towards communion. Being apart of a fellowship, taking advice, giving insight, considering others, taking help - isn't that growth? Growing up should not be pulling away from others, it should be allowing yourself to pull closer to others. Being brave enough to be honest and vulnerable. Have humility to accept anothers contribution and counsel. Realizing that we do need one another. Needing one another isn't for the weak- I think it's a path to strength.

I wonder if a community that has no choice but to depend on one another is actually experiencing an aspect of life more fully. If so, is being able to independently take care of yourself the ideal man is supposed to strive towards? I don't think so. One might feel strong and self-sufficient, but perhaps much more susceptable to selfishness and loneliness.

When I was in Uganda I noticed that these children have grown up in one large community- eating, playing, sleeping, fighting, living together. You can hardly tell who is brother and sister- they are so familar with one another. How cool. How rich. The capacity our hearts have to deeply know, love and fellowship with one another is evident in the relationships they share.


Think about the capacity life has for depth in love and relationships. Don't seek independence, seek depth in relationships. Love a lot. Let people love you. Don't grow up. Kid's are much more willing to give a hug, to make a new friend, to ask for what they need - sounds liberating to me.


Just some thoughts. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Funny life

To abide by Roberts Rules of Order, I will begin with news!

A few recent happenings:

SOMO has recently joined an awesome network called PovertyCure. They featured us on their blog! SO cool!

SOMO is revamping the website (whoot Gooey Studios)

SOMO is getting into any holiday market we can! Does anyone know of any?

SOMO has SO many ideas and SO much we want to do. AND- Christmas is around the corner. We plan to take FULL advantage of this Holiday of excessive giving. Please keep SOMO in mind when you make out your Christmas lists because we have SO many new beads!! A few are debuted on Danielle's neck:


What? You want to host a TRUNK SHOW?! To give others the opportunity to buy some presents that take purchasing power to a new level - HAVE A CHRISTMAS TRUNK SHOW!. Just email me: heidi@somobeads.com and we'll start planning. We could really use this!

Ok- onto rambling...

So this thing called reality - its a funny thing. In Gulu the reality I discovered was ugly, but at the same time full of potential. I battled a cynicism that was trying to win out my idealism and dreams. Reality is so full of these contrasts. Theft, generosity, poverty, wealth, fat and greasy, nutritious, no one cares, intense compassion, work, vacation, over priced, a killer sale. Opposite ends of the reality spectrum coexisting.




I've realized that I am going to have to fully accept these extremes to truly live in reality. After noting that, I've discovered I'm a bit of an extremist. That is, I seem to grab on to one extreme or the other. Crap.

Being back is GOOD. At first it was all JOY JOY JOY! So much joy. Tex-mex, Kelly, Church, phone calls, fast internet, a country that allows protests. My awesome bosses welcomed me with open arms and many questions. I loved being in my little cubicle with my computer, phone, stapler, tape, post-its, sharpies again! And all my coworkers walking by. Fantasy Football is in full swing and my team is in 2nd place (very realistic game)! Speaking of football and joy...Can I get GO PACK GO?! Undefeated, what?. I LOVE them. No- you don't understand. I LOOOOVE them. :)

Here's when reality sets in...less than 1 week back I locked my keys in my car. Which convinced me to get Triple A. One day after I got Triple A I graciously ran my cute Red cube into a curb. Poor thing. Don't feel sorry for me. I'm an idiot. It was a pricey wreck, so I had to pull out all the stops and get State Farm involved. (Thank you Baker Nissan dealership for always taking care of me - is it bad that Jimmy in the body shop knows me and my car by heart?). Two days later I grabbed a slick Toyota Prius from Enterprise (and yes, they did pick me up). That night I parked my car outside of my sister's apartment. This spot happened to be the ONE reserved spot (yes, Kelly, you did tell me this - I FORGOT!). Thus, Tuesday morning at 6am I: 1. ran up and down the street hoping MAYBE I parked it somewhere else. 2. kicked a brick wall. 3. stormed up the elevator leaving my sister in the dust. 4. payed $$$ to the lady behind the bullet proof glass. 5. took the (all too familar) walk of shame into the impound to retrieve my car.

Ah, wonderful Houston. It's good to be back.

A week later I fully participated in Houston's favorite holiday: Halloween. Can you guess who I was?


Life is WEIRD.

I say all this because, believe it or not, I'm trying to articulate my experiences, thoughts, weirdness, excitement and confusion about SOMO. I feel like my few weeks back have sort of represented the back and forth of extreme emotions in regards to SOMO. I had so many awesome moments and then a good deal of horrible ones. I have so much doubt and at the same time a gripping passion. I circle back to this thought: I have nothing to lose in this attempt but my pride (of which I could afford to lose). I admit: I'm nervous, I don't know what I'm doing, I feel in over my head. BUT: I'm going to pray. And try.

Do you realize what an awesome privilege it is to even contemplate how to help. God told us to serve the poor. I am very happy to be on the "serve" end of that command.

Inspiring Servants:
Brother Lawrence.
Mother Teresa.
Billy Graham.
My Mom and Dad.

So with that we push forward- anyone want to help?

Here is to a funny life we all live. I'm thankful for the opportunity of prayer and the perspective it brings.

Ciao!

Well friends, I am home. This current adventure is over. So to sign off I wanted to end with an explanation of what I actually did while I was there - productivity-wise. You've heard my stories, but I wanted to be sure you knew what was accomplished in my journey.

At HEALS...
[HEALS is a Ugandan NGO that provides school fees, play therapy and educational support to children in Northern Uganda]
I met the kids and staff of the program.
I developed and launched a system for them to track a child's educational progress and assess his/her needs.
I created a checks and balance system for the NGO's expenses.
I interviewed all the children in HEALS - a fun way to capture their personality.
I visited every school that the children attend and obtained past records and saw how each school functions.

With SOMO...
[SOMO is a Texas-based LLC that provides the actual funds for the school fees of the HEALS' kids through the sales of necklaces made by Ugandan women]
I recorded the bead making process.
I met the women who make the beads.
I purchased many necklaces for SOMO.
I created and launched a system for routine order and delivery between SOMO and the artisans.
I did a few photo shoots with HEALS girls wearing SOMObeads.
I discovered two potential partnerships for SOMO product development.

With me...
[Heidi Schroeder - a 24-year old lucky duck that still can't believe her bosses are so awesome to have let her go to Uganda]
I saw the good, the bad and the ugly.
I realized I have a lot to learn!
I crossed Bunjee Jumping off my list
I got to see London (stopped over for a few days).
I grew a new appreciation for my beloved democratic nation: America

I am praying and processing through this past month...I am not yet sure what God would have me take away from it, but I know He will reveal soon.

I'd love any and all feedback, advice and thoughts. Also- if you have any questions or want to know anything else.

Thank you for reading! I'll leave you with a few pictures from the last stop on my journey.

3 - 2 - 1 - BUNJEE

A day of pure exhiliration.

I went to Jinja. Jinja is a town right along the Nile. This is where adventurists come to raft the incredible rapids on the Nile, bike, horse back ride through the villages and anything else adventursome that involves the breathtaking scenery and the mighty Nile River.

I came here in '08 and rafted. Most terrifying and incredible experience ever. So this time around I wanted to roam around a bit more, but the priority was to bunjee!

Wonderful Sarah Contrucci met me there to join in on the fun (and cheer me on for the jump). We met up for a very hearty breakfast before we made our way to the Mountain biking group. We got lucky and had 2 guides for 2 of us. These guides are hilarious, adventurous ahese guides are charismatic, full of crazy stories and generally flirts.



The falls behind us are Bujagali Falls. Today they are actually closing them due to the need of power in the area. Development and money overrides beautiful nature, unfortunately. Many villages will be displaced because of the construction. It's sad.

After that we made our way to the Bunjee jumping spot. The butterflies were beginning. But I made sure to talk about anything else to distract my mind. I didn't get struck with total fear until I was standing at the edge and they were screaming 3-2-1 Bunjee. But I just jumped, knowing that the worst that could happen is I would die. :)



As I soared over the trees and the Nile below me my breath was totally gone- it felt like those dreams where you try to scream because something is wrong, but you can't. Then I bounced. And that was it-- I had just did what I came to do. But then I thought, man this would be fun to try over and over, doing different jumps and styles. I had tried to flip after the first bounce, but the harness wouldn't allow.


I told the bunjee guy that I can see how people would want to do this again and again to execute different forms and such, then he said they have a deal where you get the second jump for $50 and the third jump is free (if done all the same day). So I went for it.

Jump 2: Dead man's drop. You just cross your arms and let your body fall backwards, not pushing off at all.

Jump 3: The running jump. You have a full body harness on for this one, so you have to hold the cord away from your face with you hand - I ended up giving myself a small black eye. This jump was the scariest.

I think I could get used to these types of days being more frequent!

Party!!!

Saturday was the HEALS party.

The kids spiffied up their uniforms.
Judith and I dressed in our African Finest. So did the parents.
It rained.
Then it stopped.
The kids sang.
And danced

and danced.

and danced.


We drank soda.

It rained again.

I took very stoic photos of the families.

Then finished with a SOMO photo shoot. Adorable.




It was a good day.

Pretty distraught

Wow. I'm sure everyone has had one of those days where something so incredible happens and then in the same day something so awful. Of course, your mind focuses on the awful, causing the good to just fade.

I'll just go through my day chronoligically because I have no idea how to convey this all. Sorry for the depressing tone of this post.

This morning I worked with Denis in the office. It was productive. Things are coming together. I feel really good about the systems that have been set in place. It is now just up to them to utilize them.

At 1pm I met up with Sarita, the founder of the Zion Project (www.zionproject.org) - thanks Stephanie Schneider - and was so encouraged and excited by her. Zion Project is doing phenomenal things with woman who are escaping prostitution. The women were full of emotions and personality (two very stiffled things here) as they greeted me with massive hugs (one even left nursing her baby and charged at me bare chested - I pretended to be unphased). It was evident that God had worked in their hearts, using Zion Project to encourage identity and joy.

Sarita then took me to their girls home. Same vibe as with the ladies. They too swarmed me with hugs. There is literally a lighter air in these environments. These girls who had been trained from as young as 4 in prostitution have been rescued to live in a safe and loving home whose rock is Christ. Interacting with kids my entire trip, I have gotten to see glimpses of the silly goofy kid that lives deep within them. Yet, seeing these 10 girls that have been embraced in truth and love for 1-3 years reminded me how oppressive this place is for kids. These girls were free. It was evident. It was the coolest thing to witness. An overwhelming amount of goofy and silliness.

After that she took me to meet Ron and Joy, two Kenyan missionaries. I can't really even explain this encounter. I felt like God was giving me a big hug. The oppression here is thick, but God is moving. Meeting Ron and Joy was a welcome reminder of that. We opened our time in prayer. I hadn't participated in fellowship like this since I'd come. I came to work. To structure, to contribute (literally as I typed this my oh-so-organized-well-thought-out-2-years-out calendar I've tacked on the wall for HEALS fell down - ha!). Anyhow, being surrounded by fellow believers felt cozy. Into our conversation I learned that there vision is to start a school. So- not only were they Followers, but education advocates (I felt so normal!).

Sarita then dropped me at the Market so I could pick up my newly made pants (stay tuned). At this time school had just let out, which meant there was an above average amount of kids interested in my mzungu-ness. In order to not feel totally rude, I stay pretty focused on what's ahead and pretend not to hear all the "mzungu how are you"'s. Something grabbed my attention- a dog - he looked a bit crippled and mangie. But then I noticed behind the dog a mother was horrifically beating her child. I kept walking. Then it truly dawned on me what was going on - this woman was chasing her child and beating her, the daughter was screaming bloody murder, falling to the ground, trying to get away. There were more than 20 people within 20 yards witnessing. I literally stopped in my tracks and stared. Kids walking by stopped and stared at me staring at the scene. I was frozen - I didn't know what to do. I thought maybe my staring would break up the abuse. I didn't even notice that the dog was barking, growling and moving towards me. Then, one of the ladies called the dogs name because the dog was running at me. I backed away, but then remembered that would only goad the dog. So I stood still already thinking about the rabies shot I'll need. But the dog left me alone. I walked on, pissed, sad, mostly pissed. I didn't know what to do. I was asking God, what I should do. I heard nothing, but I knew I was walking the wrong way, so I turned around and walked back to the scene. I marched up to the mother and other women sitting there surrounding the balling child and asked her why she was abusing her child. They chuckled and explained she'd done something bad. I don't even know what I said, i just kept asking why were they doing this- she is just a child. I had really caused a scene. They reasoned that this doesn't happen everyday. I wanted to grab the girl and take her away to safety. But I didn't. I don't know how long I stood there just staring at them- terrified, enraged, feeling stupid, yet empowered, trying to figure out what to do next. I left the girl and the family.

I got about 300 feet before I broke down. What the heck am I supposed to do? Am I to just shrug at what I witnessed. It is SO common to beat your child here that you just get laughed at when you question it. People console you and agree that it is terrible, but with no surprise or hope of fixing the situation.

I don't know this girls name, but please pray for her. I don't know why I saw this happen, was I supposed to take her? I don't know, I don't know.

Even writing this I feel really dramatic and sappy. I don't really care.

I feel like David when Uzzah dies after touching the ark. (2 Samuel 6). Pissed. But then the ark goes in Obed-Edom's home and the home is blessed and hope is renewed. Please pray with me for the girls home - let's put the ark in her home and believe it will be blessed. I don't know what else to do.

I finished the night having dinner with Monica and Germina - they told me countless stories of the corrupted government here. It really lifted my spirits.

So much to do, so little time

First off- sorry for the double post, technical glitch.

Second- Sorry for no pics. Power is limited, so I'll submit them later.

Did I tell you all that I got lost running the other day. I literally ended up in a circle of huts. Hard to look like you know what you are doing when you have no outlet, are white and wearing short running shorts. But I gave it my best go, did a small loop around the huts and headed back the way I came, thinking to myself, "where the heck am I." I felt like a Lion running around, people were calling their kids out of the huts to come look at the Mzungu running by. Kids would swipe me as I passed. I kept trying to find desolate roads, but wound up in spots where it was even weirder for a mzungu to be around. Whatevs- I gave them all something to talk about.

My time here is ticking. I'm not sure when I will be back to Gulu. Half the time I feel like would be ok if it was for quite a while. But when I'm running around town with Judith gathering beads and visiting tailors, eating dinner and talking about our very different upbringings with Monica and Germina, sitting by a fire looking up at the stars in the clear clear African sky and most of all dancing with the kids - I get eager to return soon.

I comfort myself by concluding kids are the same everywhere, but there is something in the spirit of an Acholi that is so loving and irreplacable. It's really evident in the kids. You can see their desire to contribute to their society for the better. There is a great respect put on your fellow human being as well. Whether they take time to talk to everyone as they pass or tending to a kids that isn't their own. They love being an Acholi. There are no boundaries in this culture. Factors such as no electricity, outdoor kitchens, bathrooms and no car contribute to being out and about, mingling your entire life.

Anyhow...yesterday I danced my FIRST ACHOLI DANCE! In this one girls went and picked a man. I picked Oyat Emmy. During the dance I felt so African I literally was taken aback when I swung my arm out and it was white. I got to a point where it would have made more sense to me to see my skin as black. HA! By the end of the dance, every boy was fighting for my love! I think I will try this dance in the States at my soonest opportunity- might help me find a suitor!

Yesterday and today consisted of beading with Margaret, Margaret and Concy. Today, as well, at 9am sharp, the HEALS kids swarmed in to draw pictures (thanks Janie!) and finish interviews. I taught a few of them baseball. They are good! We did have 1 swollen eye by the end. He'll live.

We are having a huge party Saturday at HEALS. Parents are coming for the first time to see their kids dance. We aren't sure if we will do Samosas or just donuts and bananas...donuts and bananas are cheaper, thus they have my vote. We'd like to get them all Soda too...it'll be quite the event! Kids were stoked when we announced it today.

Goal for the last days: eat as many avocados and sweet bananas as I can - had 3 bananas and half an avocado today.

Oh! It has been a crazy experience trudging around Gulu to visit the bead artisans and purchase beads. Our movement and activity has spread about Gulu. Judith has been approached by about 2-3 bead makers a day who have "heard she buys beads" or with the question, "where is your mzungu?" Today a women found us at the office to inquire.

Guess what- I had to "fire" a girl today. She was heading up the Education Program, but wasn't really doing anything, at all. So, Jolly, Tom and I decided that it'd be best to allocate the responsibilities to another volunteer. She didn't seem to mind. It was quite painless. I think I was more devastated than her.

Power just went out. Gotta conserve. Night.

WHA! | Margaret, Margaret & Concy

Ever had a day where you are so hyped and had so much fun you just kindof bounce on your chair like a kid...?

That is what I am doing right now.

Maybe it's because it was LAUREN SLYH's birthday?! (SOMO's Creative Director!)

My today:

8am-1pm: I was quite productive getting office logistic done. (I love checking things off a list!)

Lunch: Went and ate DELICIOUS beans and rice and chapati with Tom (the director of HEALS)- he paid, so nice!

2:30pm: Met Judith (our lead designer) back at the office. She had a MASS of SOMObeads!!! This is where the fun begins...I'm going to divert from my day and tell you about Judith's day.

Judith's today:

Wait, I have to start with a bit from yesterday.

The Gulu-grapevine had spread that Judith was looking to purchase beads. Apparently, at 8am 3 bead artisans: Margaret, Margaret and Concy had treked to the church where Judith normally goes to buy SOMObeads in hopes of catching her. But Judith was not there, so they left. At 11am Judith and I went to the church to buy beads. At 2pm Margaret, Margaret and Concy returned to the church, because they had heard we were there. But we had left. At 3pm Judith returned to the church, sans me, to grab our purchase. In front of the church sat Margeret, Margaret and Concy waiting for Judith. But, they weren't sure exactly who Judith was. So, when she came out with a sack of beads, Margaret, Margaret and Concy walked/ran after her yelling "Judith? Judith?" and when Judith turned around they were elated! "We have been looking for you for two days!" They carried her sack of beads and walked with Judith, demanding her attention. "We have beads!" "We remember you buying from us before" "You were pregnant and hormonal" "But we want to work with you" Judith was quite amused. She told them to bring what they have to her house tomorrow and she will look at their stock.

Margaret


Margaret

Concy
Ok-Judith's today:

7am: knocks on the door - Margaret, Margaret and Concy wasted no time and came at the earliest, somewhat appropriate morning hour with their creations.

The next 5 hours: Judith looks at their stuff. It's good! BUT- it needs a bit of re-working. So, the ladies plop down, Judith makes breakfast for all of them and they begin breaking-up and re-stringing/designing the beads to Judith's liking. (She's a master designer with a HIGH standard!)
Laughing and stringing all morning in Judith's home, Margaret, Margaret and Concy told of when they first met Judith. Judith was pregnant with Trinity. She had come with urgency and attitude needing beads for purchase and FAST! Judith was pregnant, matter of fact and hormonal. The beads were good, but the designs were not. So Judith told them if they want her to buy, they should make them like this... And so they did as Judith instructed. Today, Margaret, Margaret and Concy got to meet Trinity. They predict that she'll be stubborn, because she made the mother SO stern.

They told Judith they know this is God's arranging. They had been looking for her for 2 days, heard accounts that Judith had been all over town with a Mzungu. Determined and desperate, Margaret, Margaret and Concy needed Judith. They told her how thankful they are - they have kids at home who should be in school, but the money's not there. (SOMO may be a small operation, but hearing Judith tell me the effect it is having on these 3 women makes it feel pretty astronomical)

When Judith came to the office she was stoked. She had a blast designing all morning with those women!

Back to my today:

3pm: Judith and I map out a plan. Tomorrow, Margaret, Margaret and Concy will come over at 9am and help us finish the designs. Then on Monday we will go with them to cut papers, roll the beads and shallaque (sp?) them for the rest of our order!

3:15pm: Go to meet Margaret, Margaret and Concy in the market to pay them for the beads.

Margaret, Margaret, Concy and Judith chatting.


4pm: I swing by the tailors and pick up my quilt. CHECK IT OUT!!!!!! Everyone should have one of these! I'd buy you all one, if I could. BUT! I'd love love to bring one back for you if you paypal me the cash ($40)! Paypal heidi.rose.schroeder@gmail.com. It is incredible!! It's about 5.5 feet by 4.5 feet. This is a gift, but I'm tots getting myself one!



4:30pm: I buy sweet bananas and bread for the Margaret, Margaret and Concy's breakfast tomorrow.

5pm: Hop on a Boda-Boda (motorcycle) with Emmanuel (he is a student and a net baller (basketball) player at Gulu University) - I'm going to go shoot hoops on Monday with him! Ha!

5:15pm: Return to the office to do interviews. Only Lussen is around. So, we had some time to goof off. I discovered a future model...





7pm: We finished the day with some action shots of Lussen, Marvin, Sam, Patrick and Judith!


7:30pm: I whip open my computer, bounce on my seat and write to you all! Thanks for reading!

9pm: Go to Kope Cafe for dinner with Monica and Germina (a Bugandan girl I met). She's hysterical. We discussed the recent Lagumbo (Lugandan for gossip).